Posted by Kelli Joan Bennett
Day 7 Year 2: I got a call from Ridiculously Generous, Amazingly Talented and Very Successful Actress Friend at 3:45pm yesterday. She was recently in town for the holidays and I didn’t get to see her because of one reason and one reason only: SAG! The day she could get away from her family was the day I was drowning in filling out all of the required SAG paperwork for the project. No, not happy about that.
It was so good to hear her voice, catch up and have her calm me down about all I still need to do in the next 8 days—from the production end to the acting end—before we’re officially underway. I mentioned in yesterday’s report, Day 6 Year 2, I haven’t been able to relax. Which was putting it mildly. I have been in a constant state of heightened anxiety for awhile now with no relief and honestly, no fun in between. “I’ve had the thought—more than once in the last few days—that I want to I Dream of Jeanni it and wake up on January 27th after we’re all done,” I shared. “But what’s the point in that?” was Ridiculously Generous, Amazingly Talented and Very Successful Actress’ response. “The point is to have the experience, right?” Exactly! If I wanted to stay safe and comfortable, I wouldn’t be doing this in the first place. The whole point of all of this is to have an experience and if I’m not present during the experience then I’m not actually experiencing it and I’m missing the whole point.
Long story short, the call shifted me and for the next five or so hours, I relaxed and had a blast working on the movie, going over my lines, ordering Police crime scene tape, and talking with my dentist, Dr. Beverly Woss, who is playing the dentist in the movie. Thank you, Ridiculously Generous, Amazingly Talented Actress Friend!
This morning, not gonna lie, there’s still a pesky trace of low level anxiety in my body. Perhaps it will escalate as the day goes on, I don’t know. We have a production meeting this morning, then a make-up test after and I still don’t have my wardrobe for my character yet. But here’s the plan: To stay connected instead of disconnect; to be in my body instead of out of my body; to let myself have fun; and, to actually have the experience!
Until tomorrow, create from what you have…the actual experience of what you’re doing.